My Race Across the Sky (Leadville 100 MTB Race) - Part I - Face Your Fears

The bottom of Powerline.
Pushing it to make the cutoff

I have been sitting on my Leadville 100 MTB Race blog posts since August. "I don't have time" was my excuse. Travel, more races, training, more travel. At least this is what I was telling myself. Then I realized that I was spending more time on catching up on my favorite TV shows than on any on the above list of excuses (well almost). It was time to admit to myself that those were just excuses for my lack of motivation to sit down and write my story. The truth is that every time I sat down to write it I felt stuck. It wasn't "flowing" like the first part (here). I was struggling with telling my story, or more with what/how to tell it. So like anything else in mountain biking (and life), you gotta keep trying until you find the flow. Once you do you gotta keep going with it or keep looking. So here goes. No excuses.

About 10 days before my big day, my A race for the year, August 13, 2016 - Leadville 100 MTB race day. I received an email titled "Face your Fears: How to Risk Failure So You Can Risk Success" from Carrie Cheadle. I subscribe to her monthly emails as they have good tips on mental training. I opened the email and this is what it said:

"you have to be willing to risk failure in order to risk success ... you will never know what you are capable of if you are not willing to risk failure. You will never know what you are capable of it you aren't willing to step into the unknown. You'll go through life wondering "what if ... what if I just taken that step?"

(here is a link to her full blog post: here).

car loaded and time to go

This is so true and this email came at just the right time. It just hit a spot, and it still does even a few months after Leadville 100.

This is exactly how I felt about my Leadville endeavor. Am I crazy to sign up for this race? The answer is probably YES, but I have done crazy things in the past (and some of them you can see in this blog). How come this time it is so different? Well the obvious reason, as I wrote in my previous blog post (here): This time I wasn't planning on just riding but I was actually hoping to race it. That is if you can call what I do "racing". It was my mindset that was different.

Clearly I was very nervous about that, but it wasn't the only reason for my nervousness. It's been a strange year for me and very challenging in more ways than just my racing adventures. Let's start with changing my athletic focus "from triathlete to mountain biker". Add to that lots of work related travel (you can read about some here), more than I have ever done before. New role at work and a new boss, etc. All leading to work related stress. Then add where I live, hmmm, not the best place to train for a race like Leadville. I mean really? Coming from sea level flat terrain to very hilly race taking place at min altitude of 10,000 feet. Ambitious for sure, but I was hoping the beat the odds.

It all lead to a roller coaster year with me trying to ride it as best I could. Time, however, stops for no one and as much as I was trying to ignore the approaching date, it was time to pack the car and head to Colorado.

First "easy" ride in Colorado - It's never easy when you go up and are at 9,000 ft

Trying to Build my Race Confidence

We got to Breckenridge, Colorado mid day Sunday. Unloaded the car, had a quick lunch and I headed out for a quick spin to get my legs going after the long drive. I decided on a trail I rode in July, to see how I compared to that ride. It starts with a short steep climb that back in July I had to stop several times to catch my breath. This time, I rode up without stopping. I am off to a good start, I thought to myself. Finally I was feeling positive and was able to push away my doubts, nervousness and concerns. I was starting to relax. Sadly though not for long ...

On Monday, I met with Margo, a Betty teammate to pre-ride part of the Leadville course. This rad lady and I "met" on Instagram last year and then discovered we are both on the same team representing Betty Designs. I chose to ride St. Kevine's as I was very nervous about the climb remembering that back in July I struggled.

With by Betty Sista - Margo (Team Betty Designs) 
St. Kevin's - right before the storm

Pre-riding the Boulevard

We had a nice group for this ride and I got some good tips from Margo on race day (thanks Sista!). I was taking it easy, but overall having a good day. It felt easier than the last time. After a mandatory photo stop we finished the climb. My silent prayer that the menacing storm making its way towards us will somehow change course was shut down with the loud sound of thunder. As we started our descent it started pouring and hailing (I think). Of course the temps dropped and very quickly we were all just freezing. I was doing my best to just press the brakes. Finally at the bottom we bailed into a campground and were able to warm-up by a fireplace inside until our car rescue arrived. My hands were so cold that I actually asked someone else to dial my phone. Thank you Michelle and Summer for the rescue. Although now I was feeling better about St Kevin's, I knew that if its going to rain on race day, my day would be over. I was keeping my fingers crossed for rain later in the day. Oh good, another thing to be nervous about. Yes, I know the drill, no point to stress over what you cannot control, but it's easier said then done.

In hopes to stop my growing pre-race jitters, I spent the next days sampling segments of the course to better visualize what it would look like in a few days. Conquering the Boulevard (the last few miles of the race) was such a moment and it made me feel better. But not for long, as Ms. Self Doubt crept in again. I was hoping my legs would be as strong when I get there at mile 100 or so but deep down inside I was also hoping to get to that section.

My Riding with the Stars experience - Team World Bicycle Relief

Beyond being grateful for the opportunity to ride in Leadville for such a great cause, my racing with Team World Bicycle Relief brought some great opportunities. Taking my mind off the stress I was feeling that week, meeting some interesting new people and enjoying riding with riders that I have no business riding with. I call it my riding with the stars moment. Why moment? Because I was able to stay on Ted King's wheel for about 3.5 miles until we reached the start of the gravel section and he, and the others, just took off, but it was fun while it lasted.

World Bicycle Relief Ride Course Pre-ride (Chris Dnavan, thanks for the photo)

After my moment of glory and another slow but successful climb of St. Kevin's plus riding the Boulevard, the party continued with an invite to Fatcyclist house for dinner. Where I got to meet the faces behind the stories - Fatty, the Hammer and the Monster. Meeting some more of the World Bicycle Relief team, hearing some Leadville stories from race veterans and witnessing the Buckle Duel between the Fattie/Hammer team (showcasing their collection of big Buckles) vs. Ted King's Dirty Kanza "small" Buckle. It was time to head back to Breckenridge on a high note and enjoy an easy ride with breathtaking views the following day.

Team World Bicycle Relief 

More Pre-race Jitters

The week was passing rapidly with high and low moments and then it was Friday. Time for packet pick up, expo and the famous course briefing. We got to Leadville early enough to have time to enjoy the expo before the 11am briefing and get a team WBR photo. Meeting the entire team this time I was amazed at the impressive lineup of cycling stars that were part of the team and hearing their story of why they are here in Leadville. The picture below and our pre-race team meeting/briefing will be the first and last time I will see them. Yes, I am not delusional. I was starting at the second to last corral while all of them were starting at the first and lets face it even if I was staring with them, they would be gone in 2 seconds anyway.

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We enjoyed the sun, strolling around the expo. Scoring some pink Boas for my shoes (as you all know #pinkisbadass), and shortly before 11am the expo was almost empty. It was time to head to the gym for the course briefing. But the real reason we all made our way there was to listen to the famous speech of Ken Chlouber. The gym was so full that I had to stand almost in the hallway. I couldn't see anything but I could hear.

As Ken Clobber was saying those very famous words "you will have to dig deep" my stomach was truing like it never did before. I was thinking to myself, yes he is absolutely right. I will have to dig deep tomorrow. Although in that moment I had no idea how deep.

The gym is full - pre-race briefing 

At night going over my imaginary list I concluded:

Race packet - check

Course briefing - check

Prepare bike and nutrition- check

Traditional pre-race dinner - check

Alarm set - check

No excuses August 13 is finally here - Time to Face my Fears

Dream Big and Do Epic Shit

Thanks for reading